Will Social Media Change the Mating Ritual?

Written by on December 19th, 2010

Find your mate on Social Media Behavior Dating Site

I was reading an article by Jenna Wrortham today titled, “So Much for reinventing Ourselves Online”. The author was sharing an experience she had after writing an article on dating sites. Newly single she posted an anonymous profile and almost immediately a note entered her mailbox.

My digital admirer said he’d recognized me from a different site, Foursquare, the mobile social network that lets users broadcast their whereabouts to friends. It awards virtual mayorships to the most frequent patrons of bars and restaurants; I’d claimed the crown at a sushi restaurant. When my admirer checked into the joint with Foursquare, a notification declaring my status as mayor popped up, along with my photo and name.

She immediately recognized that with all of the data that we share with others, it’s impossible to be anonymous online!

So it got me thinking about how people will select mates in the future.

Everyone dating is a liar!

Dating sites are liars’ outposts.

A profile of someone on a dating site is a compilation of personalities and attitudes the persons WANTS to project to prospective dates, right?

They rarely represent the actual person. Everyone lies about their weight, height, degree, income, looks and personality. Nearly all profiles are filled with white lies, stretches of the truth and out right fabrications. So how can you vet people to find out who they really are before you get your heart broken?

So what if there was a program that analyzed what people did?

Let’s think out of the box for a minute and reinvent the dating process. Let’s create a new site, for the purpose of this discussion we’ll call it behaviormatch.com

The goal of this new site is to use Social Media, Facebook applications and other online data sites that share data to build a tool that can identify a person’s behavior and then match it with personality traits that others are looking for.

Let’s say you are looking for an ambitious, funny person who loves travel, is kind, loves their family and is considerate. A typical dating site would include check off boxes that a person would click on the relevant matches. However at this dating site, the software is going to go out and analyze the behavior of people who match the criteria and bring back people based on “what they do”, not “what they say!”

To find the right match, behaviormatch.com asks you to identify the attributes you want.

So you enter the age, sex, location and few other things (if you wanted to you could share hobbies, movies, books, interests etc.). Now you hit SEARCH, and viola, you are immediately presented with a series of people who match your criteria. The software instantly went out and analyzed a database of behaviors and profile information to find your match.

Your results

Now, neatly outlined on your screen is the first name of the person and substantiating data, comments and communication.

When you look at Juan, (the most likely match) you see comments he made on his Linkedin page that announced his promotion. You also read the testimonials others shared about him. You can see that he has added 5 apps categorized as funny and that an application where friends describe friends personalities, identified Juan as, “off the chart funny”. As you scroll down the page, you are presented with 6 Facebook comments where Juan gushes about his grandmother, his mother and his kid sister. Finally you see a list of data points that show he matches the criteria. Now Juan is sounding good, right!

So now that you‘ve identified 3 additional candidates, you elect to pay for the Social Media Behavior Analysis Dating service. Here’s where this gets fun. The software will now build a profile; much like HootSuite does of all your Social Media sites, and delivers to your desktop everything relevant the targeted candidates are posting. You see Facebook posts, Twitter posts, comments they make in Linkedin, and everything they have liked or recommended using Facebook Pluggins. The software, all the while is analyzing the behavior and data and continues to provide you an update of which candidate is matching your profile request.

After watching the candidates you select two to friend and build a relationship with. So you reach out to them to get to know them. You comment on their comments, photos and attend the same events they are attending. You join the same groups they are joining.

As you watch them over the next 4 months you vet out the data sets provided and look for anomalies and ethical missteps and issues that arise that might send you packing before you got committed and had your little heartbroken! Knowing that you are probably going to make emotional decisions, the software will point out specific behavior issues and FORCE you to acknowledge that you are aware the candidate is showing lapse in the selection criteria.

And that’s it. The future of finding a mate.

This new technique takes the bravado out of the personal profile and enables you to find the right mate based on their behavior.  It might sound creepy, but think about how you are using Social Media already to step into others lives.  

Anyone want to develop this with me!

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